By Stephen C. Schultz
The
arctic blast had settled in...17 degrees Fahrenheit and I was walking down the
street yesterday to get my hair cut. At the time, it didn't seem like such a
good idea. I've heard that the quickest way to lose body heat is through your
head. That’s why a beanie or stocking cap is a good thing in cold weather. Here
I was, consciously cutting off what “insulation” I still had!
I
leaned forward into the brisk wind and continued on my way down the street. I
had some errands to run and it was a tight schedule. I had called ahead of time
and the young lady who usually cuts my hair was unavailable, so I took the next
person on the list to be assigned a “Walk In”.
It’s
the front end of the Holiday Season and I was going to be out of town this
week. I would be back home in time for Thanksgiving, but it was a tight
schedule. So, this was truly the only time I had to get this done over the next
week and a half.
I
stepped to the door, head down, and turned the doorknob. The little bell
hanging above the door announced my arrival as the door swung open. Nobody
noticed. Conversations seemed to originate at the back of the building, slowly
building and cascading forward past each stall, picking up the dull roar of
conversation as hair product fragrance filled the air. It then seemed to dump
right at the front counter. I stepped to the counter and gave my name. There
was a pause, a check of the database and a soft spoken “just a moment” as the
young woman turned and walked away.
This
was turning into a bad experience quickly…and it hadn't even really begun. I
was frustrated because of my tight schedule, the person I usually have cut my
hair wasn't available, the weather sucked and the customer service at the front
counter was less than desirable.
The
girl from the counter came back to the lobby with another young lady and
introduced us. I followed her to the stall and sat in the chair. She seemed a
little timid and nervous. I thought to myself,
“Great…I
get the new one right out of school.”
She
asked how I usually have my hair cut. (I wear it short, not quite a crew cut,
but messed up with gel…not real complicated.)
We finally got it figured out
that she would cut about a ½ inch off and trim up the back and sides. She
reached for the clippers and the cord was in a huge tangle. She stood awkwardly
trying to get the cord untangled, moving the prongs through loops and wrapping
the cord forwards and backwards. Once it was untangled, she plugged it in and
moved closer to me only to realize she had not put the drape thing over me. So,
she reached forward to put down the clippers and simultaneously leaned in front
of me to grab the drape thing.
She
asked if I wanted my hair washed and at this point I simply said, “No thank
you”.
I knew that would only be one more opportunity for “Chaos Theory” to
continue its ugly rampage through my already busy day!
I
was now settled in and she started to comb through my hair. The scissors made
that snipping sound. Her fingers trembled and she meekly asked,
“So, are you
from around here?”
My mind screamed, “Oh, you have got to be kidding me!!!!”
Why is small talk a necessity when you get your hair cut? Is there any reason
to drag a 5 minute process into 10 or 15 minutes? I then simply mentioned that
I was from town…and I closed my eyes.
As
I sat there with my eyes closed and hair fluttering down my forehead at the
sound of each snip, I thought about her nervousness. I wondered why? Was she
new? What brought her to this place in time? Had her day run parallel to my
own? Was it me? I reviewed in my mind my own behavior and what I may have been
portraying in a non verbal way.
I didn't know where this was headed, but I decided to reach out. I opened my eyes
and asked her where she was from. She looked at me in the mirror. She said she
lived here locally but was from Oklahoma City. She mentioned that she had moved
out here for school and that her husband was attending the local university
studying accounting. She seemed to calm a bit and I found myself having a nice
conversation with this young lady. She finished my hair cut and I paid at the
counter, leaving her a nice tip.
I
walked out through the door, bell ringing once again and headed down the
sidewalk towards my car. Even though my hair was shorter, I didn't even notice
the cold air on my scalp. My mind was caught up in that brief interaction. No
more than 15 minutes and I had learned a lifetimes worth of knowledge.
During
the Holidays, we tend to be focused on external things…the meal at
Thanksgiving…the lights, parades, presents and Santa at Christmas. But, do we
demonstrate gratitude for those more subtle aspects of the Holidays? Do we
recognize the importance of a smile? Do we appreciate the opportunity to hold a
door open for a mom and dad carrying two little children in their arms as they
enter a store? What about a simple, but kind conversation with a timid hair
stylist? It’s the human interactions and relationships that are lasting. Meals
and toys and sweaters, while necessary, all fade with history and time. It’s
the genuine kindness and positive regard for others that keeps us connected as
a society, community and family. And…what I learned yesterday… was that it all
starts with me!
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